'batteries not included

Saturday, November 24, 2007

7:08 PM

It's Reality

The bad aura lingers in my presence, I am starting to hate myself in a way. Guess if that ever happens, I can't love others anymore. The simple logic of love yourself in order to love others takes the center stage. My smiles and laughs masked a dolorific heart, delaying misery in every way possible. Seriously, what happen? the sudden change of tone in your messages took me aback. It's like where is the love? It was the perfect fairytale when I first met you and the coversations amounted to a level of certain closeness, each message left a scent of you, keeping me in your trail. Soon enough we met up for a study time, it was my pleasure and my heart was beating. I could feel each pound expressing excitement yet nervousness upon seeing you. You were the closest to heaven that I'll ever be, but now heaven seems so far away. The rewind in memories, shatters my heart to see what we are today. I can only stare into space and wonder what went wrong. Was it something I said? something I did? and you just won't speak. Both parties with words left unsaid only aids the coldness between us. My wish isn't for the love chatters we once had, but more of clarity and transparency between us. You haunt my nights, sending my thought to run wild on a treadmill, it just goes on and on. What will drown my misery, where's the joy which once overwhelmed me. The thrills and suspense dies out now, I'm dead in your eyes lets put it that way. Questions free flows through my head, endless waves of wistful emotions drags through the day. I know this is a depressing post but it's something that just have to come out before I divert my grief to physical pain. Once again, my happiness was shortlived and a melancholy beats plays in my radio. Afterall I've said, I still bet you're not even reading this post, as you just simply don't give a damm. goodnight world...